I wanted to write about my experience with the run, since Bella and I feel like we want to be honest and hopefully inspire some of you out there. Or at least help you know that if you're struggling, you're not alone.
First off, it seems that every time we have to "up" our mileage I psych myself out beforehand. I can't help it. Running intimidates me still. Well....one mile no longer intimidates me. Two miles no longer intimidates me. Heck, three miles no longer intimidates me! But when I think of running FOUR freaking MILES??? Yeah. Intimidation city. Bella tried to get me to shake it out, and she's the BEST motivator. But then I saw all the Army dudes! Eeeek! Running in front of an audience?! At least, for the most part, I was able to run past them with some semblance of proper running form and not-out-of-breathness, but it did nothing for my already on-edge nerves. Also, for whatever reason, my legs just felt like lead. Usually, once we start running, my calves feel sore and tight and then they loosen up after about a mile. Or I'll have quite a time with my breathing. The humidity here on this tropical island is not really my friend. But Sunday morning I just felt like I was running through molasses. (Sidenote: I never knew what molasses was. I knew my mom loved to pour it over homemade biscuits and that I always just didn't like it enough to love it. It's actually made from sugar cane!)
Anyways, after mile two I was having a mental breakdown. And lately, when I have a mental breakdown while running (which is oddly the only time I seem to have them), I NEED to walk for AT LEAST one minute. So, I walked while Bella hopped beside me. She listens to her body too, and she knows that if she stops then she'll never start again. So I'm walking, very slowly feeling life come back to my legs, while Bella encourages me and never leaves my side, even though I feel awful that she has to run in place like that! She says it feels good, so I just catch my breath and we start again. Then mile three rolls around and I hit a huge mental hurdle. I have to walk again. One, two minutes go by, and I finally get the courage to start once again. Bella mentions she might need to use the ladies room and I am MORE than obliging to show her the way to the gym on base. Secretly I thought I could guide her there, we'd stop so she could go inside, and I'd just gloriously lay in the parking lot like someone who died while making snow angels (even though it doesn't snow here). But.....Bella says, "let's run around the block so we can just finish our four miles and THEN go to the ladies room!" Doh!! So, we round the corner into the parking lot...I still have .2 miles to go but we're almost to the gym! Bella takes off to the right, I go straight. As Bella gracefully makes a loop around the bigger part of the parking lot, I sort of zig zag the rest of my mileage, begging my legs to just keep freaking moving until I reach that number on the RunKeeper app. I look down. 4.01. Dang, I went OVER what was a required. What an overachiever....
So, it was a fight to the death. And I had Bella to thank for my victory. She is truly my running savior. She let me cry on her shoulder afterwards. I'm so lucky to have such an encouraging friend who doesn't judge me and who is there for me and totally understands the struggle I'm going through with this running thing. But despite my struggle, or maybe because of my struggle, I am very proud of myself. I did it. I walked for about three minutes total, but I actually did run four miles. I RAN FOUR MILES. Wow.
Today we did our own strength training workouts and tomorrow we run another three miler. I know I can do it...because I have Bella.
~ Chica ~
No comments:
Post a Comment